Bitch Slap

Dear Mr. Recline Your Seat Before the Flight Even Starts and Makes Me Squeeze Into a My Seat:

All I want to do is slap you across the face. Do you have any idea how inconsiderate it is to recline your seat before the flight even starts? Hell, it's inconsiderate to put your seat down DURING the flight. I'm 6'3'', and the seats are small enough already. Screw you.

Also, Mr. Yell at the Gate Lady Because It's Raining:

Take it up with God if it's raining. The gate lady can't help it's raining and the flight is getting delayed. She also can't help that the 75 people who boarded before you had carry ons and took up all the overhead compartments. I get that traveling is stressful and it sucks sometimes; especially when all you want to do is get home and can't. I hope yelling at the gate lady makes you feel better. While I'm hoping for things, I hope in whatever afterlife there is, that same gate lady hobbles you and makes you crawl through a field of rusty needles.